A Bittersweet Fourth of July

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This Fourth of July is bittersweet.  On one hand, I get to spend it with three other Americans who I am doing camp with.  We plan on making American food and watching Team America.  On the other hand, The Staj of Love (Morocco 2013-2015) lost its first member.  He will be leaving tonight on a medical separation.  It’s sad to say goodbye to someone who shared in the struggles of being in a strange new environment.   He will be missed.

Our group of 95 is now 94.  Over the next 21 months, that number will gradually go down.  People get sick.  Family members die.  Peoples’ lives change in dramatic and unexpected ways.  It’s going to be hard to watch any of us leave.  But we know it’s going to happen.  I’m still in awe of my Staj.  We are approaching six months and still no one has left by choice.  It seems we all want to put our best effort forward.  Many of us will succeed.  Many of us will (and have) hit walls.  But it appears that we are ready to find ways around those walls.  No one here wants to give up easily.

As we celebrate Independence Day in our own way—whether it be eating watermelon or gathering with other volunteers—we are endlessly reminded of America.  I’m starting to realize how strange it will be to experience American Holidays in a place that lets the day pass without a second glance.  The Fourth.  Thanksgiving Day.  Christmas.  I’ll be lucky enough to have my parents here for Thanksgiving.  And Christmas will be a strange opportunity to gather with other volunteers and exchange stories.

On the other end of this equation, we are about to experience the biggest Holiday in the Muslim World.  Ramadan starts on July 8th.  For 30 days, every person will go without food and water during daylight hours.  Breaking fast will families will become the new form of integration for most of us.  I’m starting to get excited.  However hard it will be to go without American holidays for a couple years, I believe it is more than enough to experience another culture’s holidays in its place.

I’m starting to realize how long 27 months is.  It’s hard to believe that we are already 22% done with our service.  The time is flying by.  I’m doing everything possible to throw myself into my work.  There are plenty of difficulties, but they are always worth it in the end.  I just hope I can keep this positive attitude through the heat of the summer.

Until next time.

The Heat of Summer

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This week-long gap between two camps has been rather weird.  There is so little that I can accomplish in the period of a week.  This week felt like a bit of a waste.  I spent a lot of time thinking–which is why many Peace Corps members fear the Summer.  Too much thinking can make you remember what you are doing here AND what you left back home.  It’s a time where you can figure out what you want to do with your service or pine over the life you left back in The States.  I feel like I’ve gone through both of these at the same time.  I am starting to develop a realistic plan of what I want my service to look like.  At the same time, I see too much of my life back in The States.

On the plus side, I developed a lot of plans during this week.  I worked on my big project–which I hope to start in full force this Fall.  I figured out what kind of books I want to spend my time reading.  I started writing more than I have been.  During the heat of the day, I feel like there is little I can do other than watch a TV show or take a nap.  The think is, the rest of my city does that too.  I guess what I thought was laziness is just cultural integration.  This really is the strangest job I’ve ever had.

Here’s a poem from yesterday.

The Quarry

Basketball Camp & 20% Completion of Service

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During In-Service Training, there was a session that a large number of our Staj missed.  During that session, there was one quick comment that went something like this, “We also have a basketball camp coming up.  If you are interested, come see me after we are done.”  That was it.  I jumped to the front of the room when the session was over.  He put me in contact with the man running the camp and told me it started only a few hours after In-Service Training ended.

When our training ended, I jumped on a train with ten other volunteers.  Three of us got off in Rabat.  We made our way to the camp site.  I was blown away by the campus.  It is as close to an American School as you will see in Morocco.  We met with everyone and were shown our beds.  The guys all slept in this big yoga room on mats.  Throughout the week, we would have 20 overnight campers in the room with us.  Their late night would lead to my gradual exhaustion as the week went on.  It didn’t help that the NBA finals were going on at the same time.

Camp started on Monday.  We had more than 100 campers.  I was assigned to the Juniors (8 through 10 year olds).  It was perfect.  I love working with young kids.  Since I’m not all that great at basketball, my limited knowledge went a long way.  We went over basic Basketball skills in the morning.  We usually followed that up with art and pool time.  The afternoon was reserved for competitions.  To my surprise, these youngsters got really into the competitions as the week went on.

There were plenty of highlights from this crazy, tiring, and amazing week.  My favorite happened after art class.  One of the young girls came up to me and told me “I drew a picture of my favorite coach.”  The picture had blue eyes and a full beard.  I seriously felt like I could have melted right there.  It was amazing.  By the time the week came to a close, many of the campers were asking me if I would be back next year.  I told them I would try my best.  In all honestly, I really want to bring a couple kids from my town on scholarship next year.

This weekend has been all about catching up on sleep.  I completely skipped the Cherry Festival in Sefrou.  Instead, I went straight home and slept for 13 hours.  I now have a good five days to catch up on everything before I head back out to camp (this time for ten days).  This summer is going to fly by.  I have a vacation to Gibraltar in July and will spend the whole month of August in an SOS orphanage.

I am at 20% completion of my Peace Corps service…and I can feel the time flying by.

Peace Corps Prom 2013

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Last night was Prom.  After a good week of preparing, the committee was able to get the party off without a hitch.  All volunteers were supposed to represent either their state or their country.  A few people came in red, white, and blue.  But most people came as their state.  Lots of college shirts.  Someone dressed up as the statue of liberty.  I wasn’t sure what to wear to represent Colorado, so I showed up in a sweater.  A few of us talked about bringing our lighters to represent the fires—but that seemed a little inappropriate.

The evening started off with a few surprises.  For starters, the food.  This will not sound amazing for anyone who has not been away from American food for long periods of time.  But we had real pizza, club sandwiches, brownies, chocolate chip cookies, and so much more.  Once everyone got their share, we were treated to a special song.  Someone from our Staj auctioned off “An original Blues Song of your life” at the Skills Auction.  An older volunteer—and my fellow CBT mate—won that auction.  After that, we watched a five minutes movie thanking the staff.  We crowned our two members of our staff Prom King and Prom Queen.

Then the music started.

Two and half hours of dancing in horrible heat is a bit much.  The thing is, we are in the Peace Corps.  When you are used to going without showers for long periods of time and are completely comfortable talking about your bowel movements with everyone, it is much easy to feel comfortable in a pool of your own sweat.   Plus, it is amazing to just let loose for just a few hours.  To top it off, we were treating to a well-organized flash mob.

We are all heading back to our sites tomorrow (or are starting the slow journey back to our sites).  That’s why last night was so important.  We have been so busy integrating and making sure we are respecting in our societies.  That leaves a lot of pent up energy and expression.  Having ten days here in Marrakesh—and a prom to top it off—is the perfect way to release that energy.  I’ve heard many reasons for why we have this training.  To go back over what we are doing here.  To give people a break so they don’t ET.  To bring the Staj closer together.

I honestly think all of that play into the need for this training.

I may not be going straight back to site (basketball camp), but I am certainly ready to get down to some real work in site.

 

Karaoke Night; or How a PC event turned into a great memory for three young girls

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When I heard there was going to be a Karaoke Night during our In-Service Training, I didn’t think much of it.  I need to stop thinking that way.  I am always wrong.  When Peace Corps Volunteers organize something, they make sure it happens in the best possible way.  The same goes for the 3-hour karaoke session we held last night.  What’s better, the second round of Assassin was being played simultaneously.

Pack nearly 100 volunteers in a hot room with no schedule, and they’ll make the best of it.  Add some music, and it’s a party.  Add in the fact that everyone was watching their back nervously, and you have an experience.  From country music to several Adele songs to an original song to Queen, I was astounded by how many fantastic voices we have in The Staj of Love.  I ended up taking short videos of each of the performances.  If I am able to get permission, I hope to post some of these online in the days to come.  Especially the “Carte de Sejour” original song—which details how difficult it is to stay legal in this country.

One of the best moments of the night did not involve the volunteers.  The room where the evening took place has several windows that overlook the pool.  After only a few songs, two preteen girls were at one of the windows, watching us.  We are all in Youth Development.  So, of course, we told them to come join us.  They ended up singing a One Direction song.  A little later, their 5-year old sister joined them to sing Gangham Style.  When they finished, we gave them a standing ovation and one of the volunteers put the 5-year old on her shoulders.  If nothing else, I hope we gave those three young girls a moment they will never forget.

I joined four other volunteers towards the end of the evening in a rendition of “Bohemian Rhapsody” by Queen.  I don’t know if we were any good, but I do know that we sang with passion.  We waved our spoons (the Assassin murder weapons) as we sang “mama….just killed a man.”  In the end, everyone in the room was singing together.  It was beautiful.  When the ITunes account jumped to “Another One Bites The Dust,” we just ran with it.  The Karaoke Night evolved into a 5-minute dance party.  Ironically, as this song was playing, at least one assassination did successfully take place.

As our training winds down, I’m starting to realize just how lucky I am to be here.  Here in the Peace Corps.  Here in Morocco.  Here at a resort.  Here in Marrakesh.  Here with The Staj of Love.  I know the next 650 days will have plenty of ups and downs.  But I think I’ll always feel lucky.  It’s cliché, of course, but I am in awe of what I have been given here.  I just hope I can make the best of it.

IST: The Prom Auction

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IMG_3517The longer I spend with The Staj of Love, the more I fall in love.  There is something electric about what we, as a group, are able to create.  When you break it down into what each of us can do as individuals, it honestly feels like we can make a difference here.  That’s what took me off guard the most when I joined the Peace Corps.  The people.  We have people from every walk of life.  They are all highly educated and highly motivated to make their world a better place.  It is incredible to be one of them.

Towards the end of our 10-Day training event in Marrakesh, we will be holding a prom.  In order to fund the prom, we held a Skills Auction this evening.  I didn’t think much of it beforehand.  I did end up signing up to sell my skills as an editor.  In the end, however, about 20 people signed up to sell their skills.  It turned into an incredible opportunity to get to know the people that make up The Staj of Love.  We had massages.  We had yoga lessons.  We had mural paintings.    We had Japanese lessons.  We had a tarot card reading.  The list was long and incredible.  I honestly feel like I know many of the people from my Staj a lot better because of tonight.

But what caught everyone off guard was how intense the bidding process got.  I won’t go into dollar amounts, but the amount gathered was incredible.  Bidding wars took place on almost every item.  After only a few items, it was clear that the atmosphere was changing.  It became electric.  People became very serious.  There was applause and much hooting when a large dollar amount was met.  I even got caught up in the emotion and bought myself a personalized slam poem from a very talented young poet.  As for my editing skills, I will be helping out on Maters’ Thesis over my Peace Corps term.

Our time at this training is halfway over.  We are going to go out with a big bang—prom.  After that, The Staj of Love will separate once more.  I’ve been cynical about the ability for us to do much good here in Morocco.  But that cynicism is disappearing now.  With the type of people we are sending out there, I’m convinced that we will bring forth a strong image of America.

Assassin: Peace Corps Edition

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IMG_3507About 30 hours ago, I arrived at a small resort in the tourist town of Marrakesh.  Along with the other 94 members of the Staj of Love (Morocco 2013-2015), we are having our In-Service Training (IST).  Now that most of us are in our own apartments and starting to get used to life and work in own towns, we gather to discuss how far we have come.  More importantly, we discuss how we are going to utilize the next 22 months in site.

But our IST changed drastically about six hours ago.  One of the younger volunteers organized a game of Assassin.  Assassin is a game where everybody is given a target on a piece of paper.  In order to kill your target, you have to touch them with a weapon without anyone witnessing the murder.  For us, the murder weapon can be either a spoon or a sock.  Several dozen volunteers signed up.  At noon, the game commenced.

This game has turned into a fascinating psychological experiment.

At noon, anyone in the game gained an intense sense of distrust.  Anyone could have their name.  People starting going to the bathroom in pairs—unsure if they could even trust their friends.  Walking alone makes it impossible for anyone to “witness” you murder and make it invalid.  The thing is: how do you trust the person you travel around with?

Only half an hour into the game, I saw the aftermath of a murder.  It took place in front of all 94 volunteers at the end of a training session.  It was so subtle that no one could claim to witness it.  The dead assassin handed her target over to her murder.  About ten minutes later, that same assassin made an attempt on my life—by getting me to pick up her pen.  Luckily someone witnessed the attempt on my life—rendering it invalid.  Only ten minutes later, the person who saved my life was killed in front of me.  I would be dead within minutes as well.

This game pulls you in.  You watch your friends fall like flies around you.  All the while, you are watching your own back.  The thing is, none of that can matter.  You have to focus on getting your next target.  This game has only been going on six hours and we are already down to about a dozen assassins.  This game will likely be over before midnight.

Ever since I was killed, it has been fascinating watching the people who have taken this game seriously.  My assassin has gone on to kill again—and has done it well.  Others take the laid back approach; one convinced his friend he was not playing the game and waited till they were alone to take him out.  There have been some very public deaths.  There have been some very private deaths.  The final assassins are all very good at what they do.

I hope it end soon, though.  I’m ready for Round Two.

The Staj of Love: The Story of Zero Early Terminations

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I am going to write this entry as carefully as I can.  As a Peace Corps Volunteer, I am advised to write about my experiences rather than the Peace Corps itself (as is the case with all government jobs).  But something special is happening here in Morocco—and I feel I must address it.

95 new volunteers came to Morocco on the 16th of January.  This size is fairly large—but that’s because Peace Corps is rather active in Morocco.  On average, each incoming group will lose around 1/3 of their group over the two years in country.  A lot of these are volunteers are lost during the intensive training process.  Many more are lost when the work dies down for a month or two.  In the end, every group losses a significant part of the group.

My group has been in Morocco for 20 weeks.  There are still 95 of us.  No one has left.  We went through the same intensive training and have not lost a single volunteer.  We made our adjustment to our final site and have not lost a single volunteer.  Many volunteers have been extremely sick—but they have not left.  One of our volunteers even lost his father—but he returned to his site after the funeral.

One of the best parts of Peace Corps is that you can Early Terminate whenever you like—no problem.  You will not receive the benefits of being a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer, but you are not punished or given a “dishonorable discharge.”  This great policy, however, also plagues the Peace Corps.  Without any real punishment, it is extremely difficult for them to curb the 30-33% crop out rate.

So what is happening in Morocco?  I’ve spent plenty of time talking about this subject with other volunteers.  The longer we last without losing anyone, the more we feel like we are becoming part of something special.  That being said, the longer this goes on, the harder it will be for someone to leave if they feel like they need to.  So, I want to let the other 94 volunteers know that none of us will look down upon you if you find the need to go home.  Our mental and physical health comes first.

All Peace Corps Morocco Volunteers are about to hit the difficult season.  Summer in Morocco gets so hot that many cities and youth centers shut down for an extended amount of time.  However, the PC administration in Morocco seems to have listened to the troubles of past volunteers.  We were brought into country in January so that we would be somewhat integrated before this downtime.  Plus, we have plenty of opportunities to continue working through the summer.

But what I really want to point out is the people.  We refer to ourselves as “The Staj of Love.”  With 13 married couples and several volunteers with significant others back in The States, we have far fewer single volunteers than most incoming groups.  But what I find most impressive is the way our group has bonded.  We have built such a support system amongst ourselves that each person seems to have an outlet and a mentor.

I, for one, have severely considered the idea of Early Termination twice so far.  Both times I have talked with fellow members from “The Staj of Love.”  They helped me change my perspective.  They helped me realize that I am here for several reasons that I had never realized.  Although I have only become close to a few members of our group, I have witnessed and heard of the support that we have been giving each other—and I can’t help but be impressed.

I know our “Zero Early Terminations” headline will soon disappear.  There are too many circumstances.  Difficult situations in site.  The death of family members back home.  Unforeseen circumstances.  I know that we will not go our full 27 months without seeing someone go home.  But that doesn’t matter.  The fact is, we are about to go to a training that will bring us to five month in-county.  Five months in Africa without losing a single person.

I am proud to be part of “The Staj of Love.”

A Day in Peace Corps Morocco

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I’ve come to realize that most of my writings revolve around specific events.  However, in order for you to understand those events in a larger context, you need to understand what daily life looks like in Morocco.  In order for you to understand, here is my average Wednesday—the strangest and fullest day in my week.

I wake up every morning around nine in the morning.  I may live on the edge of town, but it is busy enough to wake me up.  I live in an apartment complex over a builders’ supply store.  I often wake up to the owner negotiating with customers.  If his voice doesn’t wake me up, it will be the fishman.  Every two or three days, a man will walk up and down my street at eight in the morning, yelling, “Aji!  Hut!”  This means “Come! Fish!”  His voice has never failed to wake me up.  I often go out and watch him.  A lot of the wives in the neighborhood buy from him (my town is known for having fantastic fish).  I enjoy watching the feral cats try to steal the small leftovers.

I make a simple breakfast every morning—usually just eggs and cheese and olive oil.  Since everything is so expensive here, my only form of cooking is by turning on the equivalent of a propane tank which is hooked to a portable stovetop.  After I finish, I turn off the propane so as not to die a couple hours later.  I eat breakfast while watching a TV show (currently, I am watching Community).

When I’m done, I go to Souk.  Souk is the weekly market.  In Bhalil, it is Wednesday.  I walk down the tall hill by my house.  Overnight, the dirt field by the taxi stand turns into a massive market.  I squeeze to get into one of the two small entrances.  I go mainly for vegetables (a kilo of potatoes, tomatoes, onions, or oranges only cost 3 dH….with is about 30 cents).  Once I stockpile a week worth of vegetables and fruit, I trek back up the hill back to my apartment.

Lunch usually consists of a vegetable stir-fry.  I tend not to eat meat on my own because I don’t like buying meat here….I don’t like watching them kill the animal I intend on eating.  Plus it saves me money.  Anyway, I tend to watch a movie over lunch hour because I don’t have anywhere to be until the late afternoon.    After the movie is over, I gather up my things and head off to the Youth Center.

I got an apartment far away from the Youth Center so that I have to walk each day.  After lunch, I make the long trek to the other side of town.  I usually show up early so I can set up for my English Class.  Class starts at 4:00.  Students usually don’t show up, to be honest.  I’ve had a couple show up a couple times, but I’ve had a hard time getting these classes going.  I usually stop class by 5:45pm.

I get to the Cyber nearby by 6:00.  I have a regular class there.  This is my group of BACH students.  BACH is the program that all youth have to go through in their final two years of high school.  I help them build their English.  Usually the lesson evolves into more of a cultural exchange (because I am not really here to teach English…I’m here to encourage student to become active in their community).  This class usually ends around sunset—which is 7:30 right now.

I stick around the Cyber and talk to Adil (the owner) and some of his friends.  Meanwhile, I use his Wi-Fi to download movies.  We talk about everything t from movies to religion.  He’s become one of my closest friends in town.  After a while, I head back home and piece together dinner.  I watch a movie or a couple TV shows.  If I need to plan for classes or do any Peace Corps work, I do it.  If not, I read or relax.  I’m usually in bed around midnight every night.

That’s a busy day.  There are plenty of days that don’t have that much.  Those days usually involve a couple hours at the Cyber Café.  Some days I want to get away and I head up to Fes.  The one constant is that every day has strange complications that make it extremely difficult to define a “normal day.”  I hope this explanation helps you understand life here.