I am on my tenth day in Washington State.  I came here to figure out a lot.  For one, I wanted to challenge myself.  I wanted to throw myself as far away from the monotony of daily life and prove that I could endure it.  Ever since this summer, I’ve been afraid.  I don’t want anxiety over little fears to be a daily part of my life.  If, however, I must accept it, I want it only on the condition that I view it as a challenge I cannot walk away from.  I want to confront my fear head on.

The other reason I came to Washington was for love.  That’s not to say that I am in love.  Moreso, for the first time in far to long, I feel as though it is a possibility.  These ten days have opened me up in ways I haven’t felt in years.  This intense emotion has helped me challenge my fear, start writing in new ways, and has made me genuinely happy.  I don’t know what to make of these strange twist of fate…but I know now that they are worth it.  So long as you do succumb to anxiety and fear, you will find your way.

With Love,
Richard

P.S.–This entire post reminds me of Donnie Darko.  Please ignore that aspect of it.

My Affliction